Utah, Arizona, Nevada

As you've probably noticed, these posts aren't exactly posted when I wrote them, rather written in the car and posted later.  I know, its a mind blow, but time is an elusive beast (or something? I don't know). Utah, Arizona and Nevada happened very closely together, and I was driving for a lot of it.  And for all you naysayers on my driving skills, I drove "quite well" --my dad.

The scenery in these three states was fureakin' awesome, and hard to describe unless you make the trek yourself.  The Rockies in Colorado are standard beautiful mountains. But the canyons in Utah and Arizona are just bizarre. Especially in Utah; everything is so stark and open, like being on the moon (I know, having been there.) Scenic, but at the same time lonely and scary.

Still in Colorado, just outside of Utah.

Utah: Lunar Surface.

Big Ass Canyon (BAC).  I think it's call the San Rafael Canyons but google isn't helping me out.

We stayed in Cedar City, Utah and I made the worst decision of my life in ordering a salad with shrimp for dinner.  My parents told me DO NOT order shrimp in Utah, order meat, where they kill it fresh every day. But f that, I said.  F that.  So of course the shrimp came out tasting like curdled asshole (I know, having tried that).  And I couldn't even order alcohol to sooth the taste! I guess sometimes we have to learn life's lessons the hard way.

It's pretty hilarious that the state of Mormons and sobriety is right next to Nevada/Vegas. Speaking of Nevada, what a truly terrible place.  Just stretches of hot, boring-ass desert. And then Las Vegas appears out of nowhere.

Las Vegas in the distance. 

UGH REVOLTING. The entire city is made up of hotels. Who thought this was a good idea?

It is still a destination of mine to go to Las Vegas with my friends, but driving through it in the middle of the day with your parents is not the way to see it.  It looked like the worst theme park in the world.  The whole thing is hotels and billboards for strip clubs and bankruptcy lawyers, all roasting under the 101 degree sun.

Fortunately, before horrible Nevada we nipped into Arizona for 20 minutes. Which was much better.

I suspect this is exactly what Mars looks like!

When I was young I had a rubbery yellow bear which was very dirty and crusty and my parents had to throw it away. But  not wanting me to throw a fit, they told me instead that "Squeaky Bear moved to Arizona". And believing it like a chump, I diligently repeated "Skeeky Bear move to Azizona." Maybe he's among these canyons! Good family story, huh?

Canyuns are cool!!!

Just patiently awaiting my future!

Bored after 3 days in the car? Not me!! This is the face of a future Hollywood starlet!

'Lorado

Hey again! Phew, glad I’m over being cranky about mountains that represent fear about the future.  Being cooped up in a car for hours will do weird things to anyone! Today we are driving through Colorado and it is just lovely!  I passed 2 or 3 towns that were probably the inspiration for “Everwood,” and that was exciting, for me.  Although that show was shot in Utah, so maybe I’ll look for possible locations when we hit Utah next.  More about Everwood, you ask? I’ll spare you.

"I moved into a snow globe!" --Treat Williams as Dr. Andy Brown, Everwood

We also drove through Vail, that rich ski resort which surprisingly didn’t look as pretentious or touristy as I thought it would.  It looks like Switzerland. 

Vail ski resort

Maybe someday I’ll have a rich friend who can afford to take me there! Dreams, dreams.  The only bad thing about the mountains is the high altitude which gives me slight nausea.  Of course I took this opportunity to watch “127 Hours” on my computer and nearly vomited when the rock fell on James Franco and I realized I most definitely could not watch any limbs get sawed off.  So instead I watched the preview for “Love & Other Drugs” again, because, Jake Gylly was LOOKIN FOINE in it.  I thought I hated that movie based solely on Bucktooth Hath-agay (Sorry, that is rude and awful but this delete button is stuck) but now I have an overwhelming urge to see it. Is this altitude sickness? I actually laughed at the last scene in the preview. This could be my new Bounty Hunter!!

A few hours later

Nebraska is rolling into Colorado, pretty seamlessly at first.  Very flat, more fields. And then..HOLYGAWD..we start to see mountains in the distance.  

Asshole Mountains

They are supposed to be a “majestic” “symbol” and “gateway” to the “west” but something about them coming closer gives me a hole in my stomach and I begin to feel like they’re very foreboding and we shouldn’t continue too much farther. For centuries they kept settlers from coming west, so maybe there’s something to that. 

Or maybe I’m just cranky because I’ve played my computer over and over and over at Chess and lost every time. When I had Freecell and Solitaire on my old PC, I won like, ALL THE time. But Apple wants to make their users feel like total pieces of shit. Life is very, very hard. And these mountains are putting me in a bad mood. Do not enter. Do not want to enter. 

Welcome to my Blog! It begins in Nebraska.

This is a very special day indeed! After years of being afraid of/disgusted by/put off by blogs, I am finally embarking on one of my own.  I am certainly not above a website that allows me to practice writing, pontificate about myself and entertain a few people with some sweet jokes and stories!

The catalyst to starting this blog is a big (physical AND emotional!) move across the country, from my home in Chicago to Los Angeles, for the purpose of starting my adult life and pursuing some Hollywood/writing/entertainment dreams.  Whew! Feels so good to just come out and say it! This move feels, at this moment, very daunting, so I hope this blog will keep a steady connection to my friends and family, so you all can check in with me if you’re ever curious to what I’m doing, and maybe everyone won't feel so far away!

Something bad that could happen in Los Angeles is that I find out I don’t have, nor do I have the capacity to learn the tools to survive in the competitive film/entertainment industry. But something worse could happen, which is that I could have a measure of success, but completely lose my sense of self while doing it.  That would be infinitely worse than the first thing, so even though I think no city, social circle or person could change this CRAZY GURL, by god, I’ll at least have this blog to catalogue it all.  

Now let’s stop explaining myself and get to this road trip I'm on:

Currently driving through rural Nebraska.  Can I call it the Neb? Nebula of BORING?  That last nickname is based purely off of current highway surroundings (advertisements for the world’s biggest truck stop) and radio reception, which is barely receiving a Vikings game, as there are no professional sports in Nebraska.  However, underneath the Nebula of Boring, is the end of the midwest, and everything I hold dear to me.  Last night we ate at a restaurant in Omaha, which was wonderful for many midwest-based reasons. Everyone at the bar had just come from the Nebraska football game, the appetizer menu was all fried foods and the drinks were SO DAMN CHEAP.  I’m sure it’s just binge-drinking nostalgia, but something about a $5 cocktail made me consider, momentarily, moving to Omaha instead of California. Instead I watched the bar full of happy Nebraska fans, feeling like this is where the Real America lives, 
and I’m leaving it all to go reside in Fake America. 

And that’s all I have to say about that. (--Forrest Gump) 

    Me, literally reaching out for the midwest as it fades away.  Pretty deep, eh??

I leave you, as we drive on peacefully, with just the sounds of tire on road, and The Band’s Across the Great Divide.  

Dad:  "These songs are mediocre."